Take Your Chance!!

Setting the tone!! ;)

I was watching “Life In A.. Metro” a movie about many individuals who are facing their own challenges with relationships and happiness bounding to it.

We have two characters in the movie, first is Irrfan Khan – a 38 year old guy frustrated for not getting married who fails to be in criteria of normal guys. Second is Konkana Sen Sharma, she is a 28 year girl-next-door who has her challenges being deprived of hot looks and layers of makeup. Thus misses many guys! Finds a hot guy, dates him to find that he is a gay. Ruining her life in best possible way!!

Irrfan and Konkana meet over a cup of coffee and Konkana rejects him. After few months they coincidentally join the same office and spend time together at a sea shore.

Irrfan ask Konkana as why she rejected him.

Irrfan – What’s the reason you rejected me?

Konkana – Because you were staring at the objectionable part of my body. I didn’t like it.

Irrfan – I am 38 and I haven’t touched any girl, as you are so beautiful with perfect body and you are saying.. and Irrfan continues clearing out the fog. But like Delhi fog it failed to disappear.

Konkana – The guy I like might never behave this way.

Irrfan – What’s your imagination of a perfect guy?

Konkana – Should be normal.. Caring.. Sensitive.. Reading books.. Sense of humour.. Loving.. Caring.. Loves travelling.. Knowledgeable.. Creative..

Irrfan – I have a friend; he bought a car 5 years back and is still rotting in the garage. He never used it. He said that he is only going to drive car when all signals will be green in the city.

Konkana – That’s dumb guy, unless and until you don’t take out the car how are you going to find out if signal is green or not.

Irrfan -  Exactly!! Take your car out. Take your chance.

Most of us don’t take that chance “your chance” of confessing the feelings and letting the person know about it.

Don't ever wait for a perfect person, neither the perfect match!! No one is perfect in the world. Perfect person and perfect match both are relative from person to person. Imperfection brings the lame things that we do, moment we hog our food, moment we slide on the aisle or the moment we spill water makes us laugh. But what if we have the most ideal person, life would be so boring to live. I don't want a perfect life!!

We need to take life more lightly!!

I am almost 25 :D

There are obvious reasons we avoid confessing the next person know about emotions, probably because we are not ready for commitment, fear of missing out best friend, career, past relationships or sometimes just we can’t gather the courage.

But believe me it’s never that hard to express feelings. I have been rejected by few and I have rejected few. But that’s really okay!! And this doesn't mean you can't love again. You have this one life to find the right person, if one says No it’s certainly not the end of the world. Take your time to get stable but don’t let that one person from the past ruin the beautiful future. The future which holds the power of witnessing and working on all the dreams together.

For me on most occassions I have fell for a girl is compatibility - finding things in common!! If she is also into songs I hear, shows I watch, hobbies I pursue then mind and heart automatically starts dreaming of the unlimited things that can be done together.

In my case there is a major problem with me. I often like old music by singers like Gulzar, Kishore Kumar, Jagjit Singh. Loves some sensible bollywood movies like The Lunchbox, Life In a Metro, Stanley Ka Dabba,  Swades. Shows I prefer are FRIENDS, Sarabhai vs Sarabhai. Hollywood includes watching multiple times Harry Potter, The Interstellar (and I actually know about all astrophysics part mentioned in Interstellar), Inception, Jurassic Park and possibly all science fiction movies.

I hate Big Boss, music by Yo Yo Honey Singh and Mahesh Bhatt movies – which majority of the population like.

These things make me stand awkward and stupid in-front of normal world. In return I am uncomfortable with many people and I often speak intellectual stuff which many people don’t understand!! And worst of all I can’t flirt and I am hopeless. In short a mixture of Chandler and Ross - a perfect girl repellant :D (FRIENDS fan will understand it).

Easiest and best option that I see in such situation is to consider myself Tea and next person as Coffee, with one common element – Sugar!! :)

Whatever you want to do but never bombard
your feind's timeline with quotes and song lyrics :D :D :D

This sugar leads to communications; this communication leads to multiple meets and this meet to building trust – three essential things for every relationship, friendship to family bonds.

This common sugar leads to endless possibilities of exploring each others, which becomes the connection to each other’s soul. Next person might be having Game of Thrones as favourite series which gives me an opportunity to see it. But what if next person prefer saas-bahu daily soap? :D Fail, sugar is missing and salt can’t go with Tea now!!

And even if we had a bad past experience doesn’t mean we will confront same thing every day. Dumping and betraying is the part and parcel of our journey. If we kept cribbing with past then we have no present or future.

This reminds me of a quote from Kung Fu Panda by Master Oogway – Yesterday is History, Tomorrow is Mystery, Today is a Gift. That’s why it is called PRESENT!!

Not going ahead with the next person because of a horrible past is like you have been to Essel World, first ride was frightening so you skip all others. Or like avoiding SRK’s “DDLJ” (Oct 1995) after watching “Oh Darling! Ye Hain India!” (August 1995). Or losing out scuba diving opportunity in Great Barrier Reef because in childhood you gulped some water down your nostrils.

That huge is what we misses out when we keep ourselves confined to past and are reluctant to explore future.

To get over the fear of everything that you are afraid to do in life there is one scene from movie “We Bought A Zoo”. It states you just need those 20 seconds of insane courage.

In this scene Matt Damon asks guy what's up with Lily. Guy has not told Lily that he likes her so Matt explains - Sometimes all you need is 20 seconds of insane courage, just literally 20 seconds of embrassing bravery and I promise to you something great will come of it!!

Screenshots from the comments below this video –

Some failed

Some nailed

I believe life is full of surprises. Stephen Hawking beautifully narrated life –

“We are on a minor planet of a very average star located within the outer limits of one of a hundred thousand million galaxies. Are your problems really significant in light of this?

You walk this Earth for but a short time. Why not become devoted to having only a wonderful experience. Why not dedicate yourself to leaving a powerful legacy to the world? Sit down now and write out a list of all that you have in your life.”

I see many people finding it hard and confused to go ahead and take that leap of faith. Closing quote from Superman movies “Man of Steel!” - Sometimes, you have to take a leap of faith first. The trust part comes later.

Hope after reading this there will be many people who will be taking that leap of faith and be a superman of their lives. :)

Even if you failed there is no reason to be upset of - keep yourself busy to the core, take up new hobby (I am trying Harmonica and Scuba Diving now), build a skill, volunteer for NGO or best build a company. Just one life and so many things to try.

Nakhre utha iske nakhre utha

Haan dhoop bhi yehi hai

Chaanv bhi yehi hai

Joh bhi yeh kehti hai, tu maan ja

Kho jaana, paa jaana, na paana

Hai zindagi jaan le

Bik jaana, loot jaana, bas jaana

Hai zindagi jaan le

Joh kal gaya woh phir se aata nahin

Ho ho ho guzra hua joh waqt hai

Woh dastak lagata nahin

Kyun zindagi se ho shikva gila

Yeh hasti hai roti hai

Joh bhi hai jaisi hai

Joh bhi yeh deti hai woh hai tera

Kar salaam ... kar salaam!!

- Kar Salam, Life In A Metro ( Pritam, 2007)

All the best with those 20 seconds of courage, do mail me with what happen next!! ;)

Read the below article to know what happens when you get along with wrong partner.

http://www.hrtwarming.com/46-yeold-banker-finds-out-his-wifes-been-cheating-for-10-years-posts-this-on-facebook/

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Keywords: blog, love, friendship, relationship, matt damon, life in a metro, pune, we bought a zoo, friends, chandler, ross

The Memories

The Sun rose absolutely well. With the same gleam. Glitter. Shine. Woke me up early in my 18,000 square foot of the bungalow. I was confronting sun rays. Soothing me. With many crusades I manage to lift over my bed sheet. Left my cozy bed. The day seems to be genuine. Wear my Adidas adiStar Salvation 3 shoes. And went for jogging. A pre-decided 2.7 kilometers jog over a sidewalk from pre-defined aisle in pre-defined time at pre-defined speed at pre-decided location in well-planned locality of New Mumbai. Far away from chaos and dhakka-bukki.

Am 30. And still single. Bachelor. Unmarried. Marriage proposals increasing exponentially each day, and my rejection ratio was catching with the same pace. But most important thing is – I am Happy!! :)

Back home. Rang the bell and servant came running and exhaling a lot of air articulated, “Sir! We are ending up with all groceries and no servant is home!” I said,”Hmm!! At least try to make something from remain-over from last night.” He shook his head so furiously in negation as nothing is possible and if I didn’t make any arrangement we shall die of starving. Then I proposed him and presented myself to go for groceries instead of ordering him. I was free that day. In minutes I was up in proper formals from track pants and sando. I wore a checks Levi’s shirt with fluctuation of only two colors; white-red with monkey-wash Armani jeans to match it. Ignited my BMW-M6 (Bavarian Motor Works-I ascertain very few are aware of this) and direct myself to Wall Mart.

Viewed list of edibles and procured myself to groceries column. It is my first time here. Few of enlisted things were in the cart and few are up to 2^nd floor. I entered in the lift. Pressed No. 2 and the doors were shut.

With the blink of an eye I saw a girl persisting towards me (or being precise with my left). But instead of halting the door from closing I kept on watching that girl. Lift initiated with impel and thus my thoughts regarding that girl. My mind started coming up with questions. Many ‘????’ was popping-up over my head. Cupid’s arrow penetrated directly into the heart. That face seemed conversant. And a song played in my head by great Late Kishor Kumar – Ajnabi tum jane pehchane se lagte ho. Kya tumne kabhi wada kai tha kisi sathi se? Na woh pyar raha, na woh baat rahi. Phirbhi jaanee kyu..!!! Sath chale, mod pe aake hume chod dia. Forgot the rear lyrics. Reaching atop I bent to same proximity to see if she is still there; I examined her properly. And gave re-birth to memories in teenage. Human membrane seems to be so strong sometimes.

I ran back in the memory lane. 10 years back-to-the-past even faster than Michael Fox (actor from Back to the Future). Where you cherish your beautiful moments. Somewhere in them you remember those beautiful mos spent with a very beautiful person. That first meeting and love at first sight (Kyuki ek Najar main prayer hota hai. Maine experience kia hai!). Engraving to wish her happy birthday first among friends. Every little talk ranging from 10 sec call of “Call me back!!” to 1 hr 30 min jabbering till AirTel cut the call and then make HER realize – Ohh Gosh!! We talk the hell. It’s too late, have to sleep now. Then you are like ‘I want to sue Mr. Sunil Mittal or TRAI president for making this proprietary’. And then in no time tears start shedding down the chin. Eyelashes can no more deal those salty tears (as they have higher density so does weight). Still baffled to what is happening you go deeper in the itinerary. Certainly a picture comes up. Well defined. Well remembered. As fresh as first look. Doesn’t matter even if it was 10 years ago. You try to control all shedding tears. But futile.

Finally you go into the core of the memories and you still realize you are witnessing the same place where you were 10 years ago. From miniature of teacher-teacher to school playgrounds to college days. Willing to meet someone with the same intensity, same enthusiast and same amazement! Then you remember those unsuccessful attempts to express her your feelings and finally writing those five page love letters in what you wasted the whole night to give it to her and make this a special Valentine Day a day to remember for whole life. Early morning you realize the D-Day is up to give it to express. But can’t. All of your friends try to boost-up the testosterone in you with dialogues like ‘Ladka hai na tu ki chakka hai! Ja agee badh.’,’ Aj nahi toh kabhi nai.’,’Abe saale woh kamina bhi try karr raha uss pe. You want her to go with him?’ And you go up to her. But can’t utter a single word except, “You solved yesterday’s assignment?”

And next second you hear an employee announcing some un-needy, irritating offer as how cheap their products are as compared to local retailers ‘Off!! Off!! Off!! 50% off on all products from this-this company. Just for 2 days.’ (Yes! You import it directly from production line without screening. They are supposed to and hardly anyone gives a damn. And that offer remains to be same even after eons. Oops! The story). Brought me in the present tense. Still thinking of all the things and wished if they turn-out in reality. But they don’t. Law of Attraction too has certain limits.

You rubbed your wet eyes and hear a sweet sound (which is rare in the Wall Mart’s announcement), “Sanket is that you? Remember me? I used to be your best friend a decade ago?” I galloped my saliva to produce some words. But I went dumb. Numb. She was the same girl. Who came rushing into the lift. “I saw you in that lift. I have flown towards you but...” WOW! She was coming for me and not lift. Mesmerized. But she stopped after watching my awkward reaction.

Butterflies started flying in the heart. Goosebumps all over the body. Eyes still wet. Mind calculating so many things at the same instance, doing time-travel – past, present and future. I finally aired some words, “Sorry! But am not Sanket.” I lied. Her facial expression changed in arcsecond. “They say there are seven identical people in the world.” I continued. “You just meet one of them.” She doesn’t feel satisfied. “Sorry! But I thought it was him.” final words that my ears witnessed. And she was gone. Leaving me in a dead silence. I thought it’s too late now for everything. Mang mein sindur and mangalsutra was seeable. It is easy for friendship to convert into love...but love back to friendship IMPOSSIBLE!!

© Sanket Thodge

Things are changed. After ten years I finally realized the fact. Life waits for no one. It goes on!

How hard you try for someone, to impress them, to show them your love, to prove it passing second all in vain if you can’t show it at the right juncture. At right moment!! Always Express to Impress!

A rejected proposal is well digested from beloved person,

Than that person been unaware of those untold feelings!

 She was the love of my life. My best friend. My soul-mate. Still as beautiful as when I first saw her first when I was learning ‘ABCD’. People say when love of life is missed only heart breaks, but they are wrong. Every body parts develop cracks. Goes mourn. The throat becomes dry. Cheeks remain cold. Eyes welled-up with tears and heart...EMPTY!

If I had the chances,
If I had the breaks
Could have been a winner
I had what it takes
But I wasn't in the right place
At the right time.
Didn't have the rhythm,
Didn't have the rhyme.
I wasn't in the right place
At the right time.
Could've been a contender,
Could've been a star.
Never reached the finals,
Didn't get that far
'Cos I wasn't in the right place
At the right time.
Didn't have the rhythm,
Didn't have the rhyme.
I wasn't in the right place

-Starlight Express track, Rocky

That day and today; many things were changed. India’s GDP has outperformed entire Eurozone. Quarterly profit of all software companies has sprung up many folds. Now India has its own software market. America plays no factor in the world economy. Inflation seems a thousand miles from sea shore. And India in governing by youngsters (comparing as if my decision to propose that girl would hamper the BSE and NSE). The only thing that retained was her feelings for me which I never gave a chance to evolve. From best friend to what-ever-it-could. Its fate remained on the fence. Undetermined. Only things that are left are regrets and depressed in what-if-I-should-have-expressed feelings. Things might have been dissimilar.

I can just see her walk down the escalator. Trotting away. Leaving behind those obscure crystals settled on my face (some even trapped in beard). But nothing was potential. Again I checked my iPad-7 and checked all the items enlisted. And headed back to home and radio played relatable song.

Tanhai
sang dil tanhai..sang laai Yaad teri sang laai
baar baar woh bahaar phir se Yaad aayi
sooni sooni raah dil ki jisne thi sajaai
tanha dil

har taraF bikhare hai teri Yaad ke hi nishaan
meri har eik cheez mein hai teri hi parchaaiyaan

tu hi hota hai..tu hi rehta hai mujh mein har dum sadda
paas bhi tu hai..door bhi tu hi..hai Yeh kaisi khala
Yaad banke ashq teri aankhon mein samaai
Yaad banke eik hansi honton pe bhi aayi
tanha dil

chaand suraj bhi wahin hai..hai wahin aasmaan
zindagi bhi chal rahi hai..chal raha hai jahaan

mein hi thehra hoon khud mein simta hoon..dil hai gham se bhara
bin tere kaise jiuun main..kuch toh de mashwara
zindagani aisi rehguzar pe mujhko laai
saaye se bhi abb tere ho gai judaai
tanha dil
roya re dil roya re!!

---

Aren’t there any such possibilities that few of us might face the same catastrophe? Where awfully we are the person aware of our intuitive feeling. It’s only us who are copping every day to cover it with a smile. Where we handle the burden of everything...even after years. Hope so no one in this world is left in this enthalpy without expressing them. Cause sometimes,

Fiction reveals truth that reality obscures!

Best of Luck dear readers! :)

[P.S. The above story is a complete work of fiction. It has no resemblance to reality (am 20 is the proof). Just incase this matches up with someone please consider it a mere co-incidence. And if you still want to take me to international court please do the arrangement of my airline fares and a linguist and a lawyer and extra charges that I will be levied by my service provider and a list of famous tourist spots in your country. Yeah! That would neither help your country’s endangered tourism but I will do my bit.]

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Keywords: adidas, airtel, bmw, bse, dhokha, eurozone, fiction, friendship, ipad, love, mall, nse, quote, rocky, straight express track, wallmart, mall, old love, umtold love

आपले जिवन कसे असावे?

खुप दीवसांपासून मनात होते. आज हिम्मत झाली लिहायची..!!

आपले आयुष्य एका जंगलातील साधू सारखे असायला हवे.

आणि जिवनात येणारे सर्व लोक भरकटलेले पक्षी..!!

जे पण पक्षी आपल्या जिवनात येतील त्यांना पाणी द्या, दाणे घाला, फळ द्या आणि पूर्ण काळजी घ्या.

आणि पहा किती आनंद भेटतो..!!

पक्षी पण खूप प्रकारचे आणि वेग-वेगळ्या कारणाने येतिल.

काही निस्वार्थ तर काही स्वार्था पोटी.

काही सुखावतिल, काही दुखावतिल, तर काही दुरावतिल सुद्दा..!!

आता ते आपल्या निर्णयावर आहे त्यांचि उपेक्षा करायची की आठवणी जुंपुंन ठेवायच्या..!!

जर कोणता पक्षी खूप आवडला तर त्याला जेवढ होईल तेवढे प्रेम, आपुलकी देत रहायचे. कधी ना कधी त्याला त्याची जाणिव होईल..!!

नाही झाली तर समजुन जायचे की त्याची नी आपली सोबती इथ पर्यंतच होती..!!

पण कधीच त्याला पिंजर्यात डांबुन नाही ठेवायचे.

मोकळीक द्या.

खूप आनंद होईल..!!

माझ्या जिवनातील सर्व पक्षांना ऊंच भरारीचा शुभेच्छा..!! :) :)

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Keywords: birds, foe, jungle, life, love, philosophy, sadhu, thinking, sanket thodge